look at me now.

Tuesday 3 September 2013

the final closure.

Although it had ended so long ago,  I couldn't shake off the thought of how maybe, just maybe one day I'd wake to find that this will all just be a dream. That here's a wake up call. Well, it isn't. Never knew this day would come, but it was bound to happen. Letting go of all the questions I've longed for to be answered. I no longer have the right to wonder. I never did mean that much anyway and to think that he was my world while I'm just another girl, is rather sad.

However I've waited for this day. To start over, to let go. Knowing we were never meant to be together, means no matter how far we go back, we would never really stay there. So let him be happy, happier than when he was with me, with a girl much better than me. Just, wow he did it. He finally found her, after quite sometime, he found a replacement. I just wish I was fully prepared for this but, I am sincerely happy for him still. And also to the lucky girl. What we had was just "a phase" while what they're having might just be real.

In the end everyone finds better and actually commit. It's like all I ever am is either a phase,  a person who helps you get over sadness or simply, just "for now". It makes you a bit worthless to know and realised that all your efforts leads you back to not being good enough.

I hope she text him first to make him feel appreciated. I hope at random moments she would text him random stuff or tell him she loves him or even send him long meaningful texts occasionally just in case he forgets how much he's worth. I hope she talks a lot so he wouldn't have to think of much to say because I know he's not that good when it comes to talking to girls. I hope she asks him about his family, how his day was or if he's okay because he would never say; see, he keeps things to himself. I hope she would put her pride or ego aside for him because it makes him feel worthless if she didn't for not being able to talk to her. I hope she's happier and more interesting and hyper than me when they go out together because sometimes he gets really awkward. I hope she stays and well who knows that maybe she'll be the one he can open up to, the one who knows him better, who he could see being with in the future.

The one that's not me

-riri-

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