look at me now.

Monday 31 December 2012

the angle from my nightmare.


To be honest, I miss you, a lot. It’s crazy really. I mean why would I when you don’t feel the same way? Am I the only one who feels this? I feel used.

It’s how things usually ends with me. Maybe I’m just not worthwhile. People, they tend to forget the reason they start one thing, and why they stayed in the first place. Things like these gets me thinking:- was all this just another show and was nothing at all ever real? Until what point was it real? From what point did it start becoming a lie?

I’m not able to sleep and thinking of how we used to talk till the sun rises, doesn’t make it easier. Our routine; everything, slowly stopping bit by bit. I can no longer hear the sincerity in my voice when I tell you that I’m okay and in each of your sorry’s and I love you’s, I hear a force in saying it.

Am I staying for you or are you staying for me? What I dread is how this will end, will we have a closer or maybe I am to be left hanging again? Maybe as always, it wasn’t you who saved me. I am my own angel while you’re the nightmare and all this while I was trying to save myself from you.

Yours truly, riri.

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