thought of 12:40.

12:40 a.m :
The thought of what used to be

They say there's always gonna be that one person who will always have a place in you heart. Even when they leave, even if you let go, you never really do. You always end up going back to them. You might not talk as often to each other as you used to or barely even talk to each other but there's always a day at least where after days, weeks or even months when you or them, just popped up with maybe, for starters, a simple yet meaningful hello. They could be anyone at all. It's just sad to know that sometimes (most of the time I guess) you're the only one who feels that of the person or if maybe they feel that way as well but with someone other than you. The realisation of how the thought of them being "the one" applies on them but not on you to them is rather devastating.

It's the person no matter how far you've drifted apart or how much things have changed between you two, if they were to ask for help, you would be there pronto. That person you'd go catch the stars for, the one you'd do anything for despite having all the people you've met and loved or still love. You can't shake off the feeling you have toward them even if you do despise them in any way, they'd always be things you would miss about them. It's the person you get overexcited at when they start talking to you first even if the conversation is, far from interesting. The feelings always there, it's always gonna be there somewhere deep inside of you, visible only if you let it show.

Some would want this back and start over. Others, like me for instance, would want this back & to start over but would rather not. Knowing that the person doesn't feel the same way and also were the one to have left, it lets you know where you stand. And so even when I do miss this, the only time I ever go back to it is when it all meant so much to both side. I would want it back but not when they don't. No matter how comfortable I get and how far I go back, I know I'd never really stay there. Forced to move forward and I guess it's okay. I go back for the only memories left. Get the picture?

-riri-