The reason I'm such a jerk now is, I'm trying to stop myself from getting too attached to people. The last time I did so have hurt me enough. I'm not going go through that again. I don't see any reason why I should take the risk of getting hurt again. Once again, I feel so lifeless. Love, is a feeling that I have doubts on. It seems like I don't even know how to love now. "I love you", what the hell does that means? Now all I know is how to love someone... as a friend. Not more, not less. I guess I kinda believe in love less and less everyday. No matter how many times I say those three words, I just don't feel it no more you know? I feel nothing. I feel as if I've been brain wash by Aizad. Love never lasts. since when did I ever believe in that, I don't know. My feelings has gone all messed up.
yours truly, riri.
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