As cold as I could become and how heartless I tend to be or act after so much of what my past has created of me, deep inside we all know, or maybe I alone notice, that I am capable of caring for more than I should ever let myself. Sentimental and sensitive if needed to be. Or used to be. So care less to show or maybe instead scared to death to admit, not wanting to get hurt. It was never about the ego. Rather just another show put on for self entertainment. For all we know I'm just another cold hearted 5 1" chic that feels too much enough to not know which to show to the point where nothing ever is.
If you look throughly enough, to your surprise, maybe it isn't all that simple. I could end to be the one who cares so much of what she never does about. Maybe insensitive with a mixture of blunt or currently dead and static, trying to figure out ways to be human once again. Connecting to feelings and relationships with another being. Searching for what was never present or the things she lost or has forgotten. I could be both. One or another. Yet maybe, none of the above.
-riri-
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