You noticed you forgot to breathe again, just like the first time. You take joy in that smile, overwhelmed by that face and that vibe. Speaking as if it's the first time you've ever exchanged words but similar to the old times. You still get excited, with scorpions in your stomach, but tamer. You've been here before. You know what it's all about. When to do this or say that, knowing it too well like the back of your hand. It boggles you, how as silent it could get or awkward it might feel, it's always going to be at a comfortable pace, as if you have always been here. Some people feels like home, with them it's so right even if it could be wrong. Though my home isn't mine no more.
What is it when you've seen everything yet still want more? Knowing all the bad or every way for it to get worse yet still choose to be here? Knowing you're nothing more, no one special but holds on despite it all. As if it's still okay to let him see you cry. As if you never tried to move on, as if you still believe he might just come back again some day ringing your house bell, knocking on the door, deciding to stay. Never been as happy to be able to make anyone feel right. Even if I'm not to them. I've never wanted to make anyone feel so special, never have I met anyone whose happiness means so much to me. I've never been so in love.
With someone who doesn't feel the same way.
Until today.
-riri-
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