the thought of believing you're useless is unacceptable.

Have you ever felt like you're not good enough, to anyone, anyone at all?

Sometimes, okay so most of the time to be precise, I feel useless. To my friends, family, my siblings, even to myself at times. The girl who has a million dreams, who talks about how one day it'll come true, she'll make it come true, but that's' just it. She talks the talk but can she walk it? And here I am the person who gives pep talks and advises to others but never to herself. I've been quite useless. I've done exactly nothing productive. I realise that I'm never there for the ones who need me nowadays. I'm somehow, for some reason too tired to care about anything or anyone, not even myself. Everyday I do the same thing over and over again. Wasting my life on doing non-productive things and regretting it after but still does it the next day & the chain goes on and on.

Things are so predictable nowadays. It never used to be like this, I never used to be this way. I need to wake up and give a hard slap on my face. Life's too short and too beautiful for me to waste it on the most idiotic worthless things I do. Who knows maybe I'd sleep tonight and never wake up & to know that all my life all I did was complain when I actually could have make things a little better at least, is just devastating. I should go out, do something useful or different each day. I should try to be a better me each day not this.

yours truly, riri.