i'm back to square one.

 

I hear my favorite songs and I cry. Even happy songs make me cry, even the ones they put in clubs. Am I going to lose my mind soon? The radio suddenly plays all those songs from last year and the year before which was full of memories. Songs that reminds me a lot of me and you, about us, about our times together and those unforgettable moments we had.

To move on, I have to move forward but at times I need to look back just to remind myself of how much I've grown since then. To move forward is easy. It's when I start to have a glimpse of the past that's hard. Because somehow, when I do that, I just can't get my head back to the present . I keep on hanging on to the past. It's just to precious to be let go of as I keep on replaying the same scene inside my head.

What am I supposed to do? I can't take that awkward feeling I have when I pass by those who had once brighten up my days but strangers now. The look in our eyes, whats on our mind? Thinking do they miss those times as much as I miss them. Wishing our path we walk on are the same. Wishing that we could talk and joke around with each other like before without having a care in the world.

Dear sabrina, grow up. Open your eyes. Things change. Go with the flow. Don't hold back. The truth is sabrina, if you want everything you once had, you just need to have an effort. You could, I know you could. Thing is, you don't choose to. Beause if you did, you would've tried and get everybody back together. You're not trying your best so this is what you get.

I'm back to where I start. Trying to find my true friends again. Losing more and more friends. Changing for the better. Still looking back at times. I'm gonna be just fine.

yours truly, riri