close to the edge.

I leave my phone on in case anybody ever needs me.

However no one ever does.

I didn't think it would get to this. Improved person, new problems. Or perhaps same person, more trouble. I let in Dobby before I got caught up looking at the tiny circles of chemicals in front of me. I remember how it was. Counting pills, mixing types, my head isn't right, Dobby is meowing louder now. I thought, no, wait. Sitting down, I remembered Sierra. Where is the knife, where is the past, where is everything I used to keep me calm and at bay? Lets get back there, lets walk through memory lane, taking everything back like it never once left. What didn't kill you, made it hard for you to drink. My throat can't take it but the last time I said I wouldn't, I drank so much my body despised me for it. I guess my mum was right, about me being wrong.

But ma, I was so alone.

-riri-