it could be wrong.

1.12 am

Sometimes you meet the one that's right for you, but he isn't right for you. You keep falling for the wrong ones, giving each one the chance to ruin you. Sometimes you wish instead, that the one you're in love with was right, but you're not the one for him. It's funny, funny that it hurts. One day it won't, just like every other person that came and went. Now nothing.

But sometimes it gets you thinking, maybe you were too. Nothing at all to them. Then you remind yourself some people aren't worth it while some can't see how much you are. Some people don't love you enough or never really had while some loves you, they're just not in love with you. Then there are the slightly odd kind, ones that loves you, so much, yet know themselves or you enough to know that they don't deserve that. Thinking they don't deserve you. Sometimes they want you so bad but that's not enough for them.

In the end, you tell yourself if their words were true, feelings genuine, despite the fear and insecurities, they would choose you over and over again. You're a risk they're willing to take because nothing overpowers the fear of losing you. It's not the same terror as to being afraid of losing someone who doesn't love you, it's the sort of fear of losing someone who genuinely does. The way you do.

Everyone's taught to let go and throw out the things they have no use for, as if they've never known what it's all about. You're left with less and less pieces of you, of the person you knew you were. Yet you're self taught to accept things, to have faith, to believe in Him. Keep it positive despite all negativity. That for a pessimist you've become rather optimistic.

Excuses aren't reasons. People let go for a reason. People walk away for a reason. Then again I've always hear people telling me where there's a will, there's a way. That if you want it you go get it, work for it, earn it. If you let things slip so easily, it mustn't have meant as much as you claim it does. New lesson, if they keep pushing you away, they don't want you there. So move along even if it still feels wrong.

And it still feels wrong.

-riri-